I sit alone

I sit alone, my mind so full
Full of thoughts, full of opinions
A garbled mess, hard to know start from end
It is easier, I think to myself, to ignore it
Let it occupy my mind, what difference does it make?

I while the afternoon away,
There’s always so much to do, 
Time is never enough and yet,
I while the afternoon away

It has been lying there,
For so long now I can’t even remember
I ignore it, avoid looking straight at it
The plain bright white peeks out at me longingly
I’m right here, what are you waiting for? 

And then something comes over me,
A wave, a surge of emotion
I had to do something about it,
Make sense of my mess and turn it into something beautiful

The bright white beckoned me,
Clean and stretched, waiting to be touched, caressed, loved
“I was made for you to write a story on me
The one you are holding inside, refusing to share”

There’s only a moments difference, isn’t there?
Between doing and not,
I sat down and in that moment, I decided
To do. To flow, to open up, to give and to fly

The river starts from but a drop
And as it starts trickling, it starts believing
Believing in its ability to flow
To break rocks and make its own path


I am that river, I see now
I have to flow and break my inner rocks
I have to transform the stretched white canvas
And make it into a little bit of me.